I wanted to blog about something, but nothing on the lists I keep of possible blog posts appealed to me. I’m just going to wing it and see if anything thoughtful emerges. So begins the rambling post:
My Future: Lately I’ve been spending a lot of time and energy applying for scholarships, internships, and jobs. I’ve started to live by the philosophy that it never hurts to try. So I’ve applied for a waitress job at a pizzaria, various scholarships through my sorority’s national office, a sales position at a media company, and even for an (unpaid) internship in Texas or Cailfornia. I still have an internship application and another job application to go before the initial list has been exhausted. You just never know and I’d hate to look back five years from now, hating myself for sitting on my butt doing nothing when I could have been getting ahead.
My Classes: There are only a few more weeks to the semester, which has me excited as well as disinterested because I take courses all year round. There’s just something about the end of a semester though that makes you feel as if you’ve overcome some huge hurtle. For a while you forget that the semester was just one of a long string of them and feel as if you accomplished something. My classes are going well and are also pretty enjoyable. I’m getting waist deep into my communication major these days so I have a lot of courses that are just client pitches. Lots of group work *groan*
My Relationship: I realize I rarely ever talk about my boyfriend Logan and I honestly have no idea why not. I guess I’m so used to keeping things private on Facebook that I just automatically do the same on here. I think that’s a bit silly though because my blog is my place to express myself freely and a lot of the people from my everyday life don’t even know this blog exists!
So Logan dislocated his elbow a few days ago and I’ve been driving out to his house 20 minutes away every day to hang out with him. He really just needs to be distracted from the fact that he can’t use his right arm and that it hurts like hell. Being there for him through this has gotten me thinking: My relationship with Logan is so unlike every other relationship I’ve been in for a lot of positive reasons. He doesn’t take my bullshit and we both still have our separate lives to keep us from going insane. He challenges me in a way that I know I’m becoming a much better person through knowing him.
My Sorority: I’m going through a difficult time with my sorority right now because I feel that it’s no longer, “The greatest thing to ever happen to me” and is becoming more of a chore than adding to my life. I’ve been focusing more on my future and furthering myself within my major, causing sorority stuff to become more of a burden. I always said before I came to college that I could never see myself in a sorority. I no longer feel that way, but I do still acknowledge the fact that my personality doesn’t effortlessly mesh with others’. A lot of work and time needs to be put in for me to bond and connect with girls like my sisters and lately that hasn’t been my top priority. Not because they aren’t worth it or anything like that, but because my focus has shifted elsewhere in my life. I am by no means giving up though, I’m just taking a step back, taking a deep breath, and re-evaluating my priorities.